What happens to children after a divorce? Where possible, divorcing parents should attempt to make arrangements regarding their children through informal discussions, negotiating and compromising with each other without the use of the legal system. However, if child arrangements cannot be reached then you can seek guidance from a family law solicitor to help you to navigate your way through child arrangement issues.
We understand not all divorcing parents will be able to agree on how they will care for the children between themselves after divorce so if you require further advice concerning making child arrangements, contact us here.
Common issues that arise in respect of children following divorce or separation:-
- where the children will live
- who they will live with
- how much time they will spend with each parent
- how decisions regarding the children will be made.
When your marriage breaks down, you will both need to deal with the points above as soon as possible. There may also be various other issues to be dealt with depending on each individual family.
Agreeing where your children will live
You will need to decide where your children will live. This can take a variety of different forms ranging from alternate weekends or alternate weeks to more specific arrangements to suit working patterns and available childcare. The important thing to be aware of is that consistency is important for children, especially those children who are already experiencing a big change in their lives when their parents are separating.
It is important that both parents try to communicate effectively in relation to each other’s personal and work schedules and any other commitments they have. If changes need to be made to the agreed arrangements, plenty of notice should be given where this is possible. Particularly where older children are involved, it is important that parents try to be flexible with an appreciation that children may want to start ‘doing their own thing’ as they grow up.
Deciding on where the children will live, or who they will live with most of the time if arrangements are not shared equally, can feel like a loaded discussion. However, it can be helpful to take it back to basics and consider the most practical and sensible solution. For example, proximity to schools, family members and friends.
Create a Parenting Plan
Parenting plans are an effective tool used by divorced or separated parents which outline arrangements concerning children including (but not limited to):-
- who the children will live with and how much time they will spend with each parent
- how parents will communicate for example: emails, a parenting app, online calendar
- how the children will get from one parent to the other (handovers and travel)
- the children’s day-to-day routines, activities, holidays and special occasions
- financial arrangements including child maintenance payments and any expenses for children’s uniforms, activity fees, pocket money, school trips etc.
- agreements as to how day-to-day decisions will be made and as to how bigger decisions regarding the children will be addressed as and when they arise, including schooling and religion.
A Parenting Plan can be as detailed or as basic as you want it to be. They can be very useful for parents whose communication has completely broken down because intricate details can be included in one single document which each parent can refer back to.
The benefits of Parenting Plans:-
- Reduce conflict. They can reduce conflict between parents as the plan ensures both parents understand the agreement they have reached together.
- Increase security and stability for children. Providing children with the sense of routine and consistency. They will understand where and who they will be with at at any given time which can reduce stress and anxiety in children.
- Improve – or limit – communication between parents. Parenting Plans can be interactive and encourage parents to communicate with each other more effectively and in a specific way. On the other hand, where communication is an issue, a detailed parenting plan can limit the need for contact between parents.
Tips for creating an effective Parenting Plan
- be specific and clear so that plans cannot be open to interpretation which may cause confusion or conflict at a later date
- be open to compromise when producing the plan so that both parents know that they have had an input
- review and update your agreement if necessary as the children grow up or if any major changes occur
- keep a separate record of what you have both agreed on or if any agreed changes are made at a later date
- consider seeking legal advice to ensure the Parenting Plan is as water tight as possible or if there are any points of contention.
If you and your partner cannot agree
If separated parents cannot come to an agreement on child arrangements, consideration must be given to alternative dispute resolution such as mediation to attempt to resolve the dispute without the need to make an application to Court. Mediation is a way of resolving disagreements between parties with the assistance of a qualified mediator who will act as a neutral third party.
However, there are cases for which mediation is not appropriate such as cases involving allegations of domestic abuse, or cases where the parties are entrenched in their positions. It may also be the case that mediation has been attempted but it has not been possible to reach an agreement either between parties or with the assistance of solicitors, leaving issues outstanding.
In these circumstances, it may be necessary to make an application to the Family Court for a Child Arrangements Order.
What is a Child Arrangements Order?
A Child Arrangement Order is a Court order detailing the contact arrangements for children; who they will live (which can be both parents) and how much time they should spend with the other parent. It can also detail what form that contact should take and deal with the division of school holidays and special occasions.
When an application of this nature is made, it is still possible for parents to reach an agreement within the proceedings with the assistance of solicitors and possibly input from the Judge. However, if parents are unable to reach an agreement and issues remain in dispute, then the application may proceed all the way to a final hearing whereby a Judge makes a final decision.
How long does it take to get a Child Arrangements Order?
Unfortunately there is no simple answer to this question. The length of time it will take to obtain a final Child Arrangement Order depends on the complexity of the case and whether there are any safeguarding issues concerning the child or children involved which may require a number of different court hearings or the involvement of professionals.
What is the cost of a Child Arrangements order?
The cost of a Child Arrangement Order ultimately depends on the complexity of the case.
Contact us
If you would like further advice or any queries concerning child arrangements, get in touch with one of our family law experts for a free 30-minute consultation.